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Private Pirate Monkey Brainstorming...

posted by ttg_Stemmle Telltale Alumni on - last edited - Viewed by 16.5K users
Hey guys 'n' gals,

In the spirit of "tapping the hive mind," I've got a few enigmatic questions for y'all:

-- What sort of book titles do you think could be found on the Voodoo Lady's bookshelf? Y'know, things like "The Joy of Hex," or "Screams of My Father."

-- For reasons that defy explanation, we're trying to enumerate dozens of unique kinds of winds, things like "The Wind the Blows Off Your Hat," or "The Wind that Sounds Remarkably Like an Unhappy Echidna." Can you think of any others?

-- Lastly, what's your pirate name?

Not promising anything,
Mike "Sleepy Boy" Stemmle
498 Comments - Linear Discussion: Classic Style
  • sword fighting for the un-co
    insults for the creativly chlanged
    my sword is bigger than yours
    the arrfods dictonary of pirate insults
    the utlmate-insult for dummies

    pitate name captn-swaggerjonVII
  • Alrighty mates - these are from the pens of the Dread Pirate Marzipan and her first mate Monkey Alarm. If some seem similar - consider it the highest compliment, we didn't want to read all the posts and spoil the fun creating these...

    Willywind - the wind that gently blows through a pirate's pantaloons, making more than just his leg wooden.


    gullible gust - a blast of Stan's "hot air", blowing the dubloons right out of his "customer's" purse.


    zeitgeist zephyr - a wind of change, bringing you back to a time of classic adventure gaming.


    bibliobreeze - the slightest of breezes, not enough to do anything except blow over the pages of your favorite tome, annoying you.


    bung-hole blast - a strong wind that blows the cork right out of your grog barrel.


    wench's waft - the foul stench of commands extruding from your nagging wench's mouth.


    current current - the wind blowing you at exactly that moment in time.


    first-mate's flurry - with whirling grace, a tornado of a wind caused by the first mate's flurry of activity.


    whymee whiff - a shifting breeze that puts you directly down-wind of a malodorous scallywag, begging the question, "Why me?"


    giggling gale - mocks you while scattering your nicely raked pile of leaves.


    digger's draft - gas passed while the pirate digs a hole to bury the booty.

  • 13 pages of suggestions means any ideasd I had have probably been mentioned already. So just the pirate name then.


    I'm Davebrush Freapwood, slightly pirate.
  • Here's my try at it...

    Voodoo Lady Books:

    "Shrooby 'Voo'- How to Solve a Mystery Using a Great Dane and Voodoo Snack Foods"

    "Reanimating the Dead Without an Outbreak- A Simple Guide to Keep Your Zombies Isolated and Fed"

    "The Voodoo Spell They Don't Want You to Know About- by Calvin Fraudeu"


    "Winds of the Father"

    "The Wind Also Rises"

    "The Howling of the Thing We Can't See, Upon the Sea"

    "Shiver Me Wind-ers"

    Pirate Name:

    Captain William Firecannon
  • puzzley goodness, thanks for writing down some winds that were actually a pleasure to read. This is the kind of material I hoped people would be able to produce.

    ....I havent written a pirate name

    'Surgeon Stumps Trevally'
  • I think the Voodoo Lady would definitely have "Voodoo Dolls for Dummies" as mentioned earlier - everyone's gotta start somewhere, right?

    For new ones (or ones that I hope are new) how about "Pirate or Flooring Inspector - Which Is The Job For You?" And maybe out of personal interest she'd have copies of "Phatt Island Library Fines Volume 1 - A to S" "Phatt Island Library Fines Volume 3 - U to Z" and "Phatt Island Library Fines Volume 2 - Threepwood, Guybrush" - he never did go back and return that book, or did he?

    Different types of wind: The Wind That Sets Smoke Detectors Off, The Wind Of Change, The Wind Of Staying The Same, The Slight Breeze Of Perplexing Intensity, The Wind That Isn't Really A Wind Because The Air Is Calm... some of those might be good, they're off the top of my head.

    As for pirate name, I came up with Cap'n Tigz Mordan. Before you ask, the last name's an anagram of "random", which sounds perfect for a random encounter should such things happen ;)
  • Voodoo book titles:

    "The Permanence of Death and Other Unfounded Myths"

    "The Who's Who of Unspeakable Formless Menaces"

    "The Big Book of Mermaid Meat Recipes (Now With Expanded Human Part Section)"

    "1001 Voodoo Spells That Can Be Mistaken For Cooking Recipes"

    "Playing God: Hoyle's Definitive Guide"

    "How to Fix Continuity Errors Without Being Incredibly Boring" (the book consists entirely of blank pages)

    "How to Get People To Ask You About Upcoming Adventure Game Releases"

    "All the Secrets of Monkey Island Except One (Now With Revised Giant Monkey Head Section)"

    "Sam & Max: Surfin' the Highway"

    "My Rubber Chicken with a Pulley in the Middle and Me: This Sort of Thing Really Is My Bag, Baby" by Guybrush Threepwood


    "The Foul Wind of the Darkest Shuddering of a Cursed Soul"

    "The Wind from the End of Time"

    "The Weeping Wind of a Thousand Forlorn Widows"

    "The Wind That Carries a Fart From Another Continent"

    Pirate Name:

    Turnbuckle John
  • I'll give this a shot. :o

    -- What sort of book titles do you think could be found on the Voodoo Lady's bookshelf?
    • Fanhexery: How to Ressurrect a Franchise in Five Easy Steps. (or should that be 'Episodic Steps'?)
    • Canciones Infantiles Del Pollo Diablo. (or whatever 'nursery rhymes of the devil chicken' is in Spanish)
    • The Complete Guide to Skullduggery and Other Fun Cranium-Related Earthworks.
    • Emetics: The Handbook to Multicoloured Happiness.
    • Maxeus Maleficarum: The Ultimate Guide to Lagomorphic Spell Protection.
    • Gibbon-Jibbing: 1001 Handy Hints to Managing an All-Primate Crew (by C. Fossey).
    • Karma Soultra: 15 Popular Ways to Root Ghosts.
    • Casket Cruisers: Making the Most out of Your Final Resting Place.
    • Icy Dead People: 13 Delicious Recipes For Children.
    -- For reasons that defy explanation, we're trying to enumerate dozens of unique kinds of winds. Can you think of any others?
    • The ThreepWind.
    • The Wharfy Whiff.
    • The Wind That Is Strong Enough To Mess Up Your Hairstyle, Yet Just Gentle Enough For You To Not Notice It Until After You And Your Date Have Arrived At The Fancy Restaurant.
    • The Chill Wind of Timber-Shivering.
    • The Chilli Wind - now with 35% more jalepeno!
    • The Barnacled Breeze.
    • The Wand of Erroneous Typos.
    • The Dreaded Draft of Domenic Armato.
    • The Wind That Broke The Camel's Back.

    -- Lastly, what's your pirate name?

    Captain Glaceberg...because it's like glacier and iceberg mixed together...yeah, I suck. :p

    *edit* Oh! Or Captain Petard, which is awesome for any number of reasons.
  • A Fistful of Monkeys: How to survive a duel by Captain Leone
  • While I think some more book names... "Captain Luthier" wasn't piratey at all, so can I change it to "Captain Roderick Hawke"? I don't know why, but I kinda like it :)
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