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My scripted idea for a Sam & Max ride (BEWARE OF LONG LOAD)

posted by Guy in a Box on - last edited - Viewed by 1.1K users
Hey, remember when I made a thread about what a Sam & Max theme park ride would be like? Well, neither do I! Regardless, I wrote a screenplay on how I think the ride would be like. It's a work in progress, but it's coming out pretty well so far. Right now, it's just the pre-show stuff. Anyways, enjoy!

Alright, I can't post the Word document because it's too big in size. Apparently, it looks like I'm going to need to paste the writing in.

We go inside the ride area, and the queue is made to look somewhat like the hallways of SAM & MAX'S office building. There are a few TVs here and there that show small clips from the SAM & MAX games from Telltale. They also give subtle foreshadowing to the upcoming events in the ride.

Once we get to the front of the line, we are told which boarding row we will be going on. In the pre-loading room, there are a few video screens placed on either side of the wall. Right now, they are playing a looping animation of the Freelance Police symbol spinning.

Once everyone is herded into the pre-show area, the animation starts flickering to static, and the pre-show begins. SAM is in front of the camera fiddling with it, then backs away and shows that we are seeing a feed of SAM & MAX'S OFFICE. MAX is standing in a corner.



There we go, finally got it set up.

About time. I've been trying to practice my lines for way too long now.

(ahem) Welcome, money-givers, to the offices of the Freelance Police! I'm Sam, the tall and smart one.

And I'm Max, the cute, cuddly, psychopathic trigger-happy one!

We're here to show you the behind the scenes of how us policemen do our jobs.

Some say it's crazy, some say it's animal cruelty, but I say it's fun![/CENTER]

Just then, the PHONE RINGS.

(gasp) I GOT IT! I GOT IT!!

I got it!

No, I got it![/center]

The two start fighting, and accidentally knock over the camera. Now, the only thing being heard is their fighting and the PHONE ringing. Suddenly, they stop, and the PHONE is heard being picked up.

[center]SAM (O.S.)
Hello? Yes? Yes? Yes! What? … I'm sorry, what? No. Yes? Yeees? Holy mace-wielding minotaur kings! We're on our way![/center]

SAM hangs up the PHONE, and as MAX is talking, SAM is putting the CAMERA back onto the table.

Who was it? PETA again?

Not this time, my furry little pal. It was the Commissioner.

Oh, good. That means they haven't found me yet.

Apparently, those rat vigilantes, the Skinbodies, have came back to power and are stealing hair supplies the city over!

Gasp! Now how will I make myself all deranged and adorable in the morning?

Don't you worry, we'll put a stop to it. But it looks like we might need to (motions towards audience) bring these guys along with us.

Great. More dead weight.

It's a good thing I bought all those miniature DeSotos a few days ago, for some reason.

How incredibly convenient!

But first, we have to show these people a mandatory ride safety video, or else the Disney/Universal guys will be all over us. Max, if you'd do the honors?


MAX bends down in front of the CAMERA and presses a button. The picture flickers into static and after a few seconds, the picture flickers back and the C.O.P.S from the TTG games come up, floating on a blue-and-black background.


Hello, and welcome to Sam & Max: The 3D Ride! We are the Computer Obsolescence Prevention Society, better known as the C.O.P.S!

Before you enjoy the awesomeness that is this ride, we need to go through a few safety regulations.

(beeping noises)


All in due time, friend. Anyway, onto business. We were originally going to offer everyone Augmented Reality Goggles, but due to some … er, miscalculations...


...we decided to give out Augmented Reality Glasses instead![/center]

A rotating animation of the AUGMENTED REALITY GLASSES appear on the right of the screen.

Be sure to pick them up in the kiosk next to the doors as you go inside![/center]

The AUGMENTED REALITY GLASSES shrink out and disappear.

And be sure to put your glasses in our Augmented Reality Glasses Containment Bins when you leave, which are conveniently located behind the exit doors.[/center]

A rotating picture of one of the AUGMENTED REALITY GLASSES CONTAINMENT BINS appears on the right of the screen.


No, they are Augmented Reality Glasses Containment Bins.[/center]

The animation of the AUGMENTED REALITY GLASSES CONTAINMENT BIN shrinks and disappears, much in the same way as the last animation.

Be sure to go all the way around to the end of the row and sit. Each seat gives you a good view of the ride, so don't be annoyed.

If you have heart problems, pregnancy, or if you're just plain scared, there are a few non moving seats in the front. And finally, no eating, drinking, smoking, kissing, hurting, killing, maiming, shooting, laser blasting, bouncing, chasing, choking, or spontaneously combusting while on the ride. And that's it!

(short congratulatory tune)

Thank you for listening, and enjoy the ride!


Yes, my friend. Yes you may.

YAY! (ahem) (in booming voice) DOORS OPEN NOW!! THERE IS NO ESCAPE!!!!

At this cue, the automatic doors swing open, and we go in.[/center]

That's all I got. What's your feedback?
26 Comments - Linear Discussion: Classic Style
  • Sounds pretty good. Maybe we need a theme park ride for them. But the pre-show script looks good, seems like it has a nice tone from the telltale games to it.

    BTW, might want to see if you can go for a slightly longer Sam exclamation at the phone, seems slightly short. But good base for it, though.
  • Yeah, that Sam exclamation is from the games themselves. I'm just using it as a placeholder until I can think up a good one.
  • I want to see the rest! This is awesome!!!
  • I haven't gotten the whole ride footage idea yet, but expect it to come in the next few days ;) Until then, enjoy this:

    [right]RIDE SHOW[/right]

    We go into a slightly hexagonal room, with two angled walls on either side of the wall with the screen. The screen is only showing black right now. We each go into DESOTOS and sit in our seats. Once everyone is seated, the show begins. The screen is still black, but we hear SAM & MAX's voice over the speakers.

    [center]SAM (V.O.)
    Are we comfortable, Max?

    MAX (V.O.)
    I think so, Sam. I just can't get this seatbelt on. I think my vital organs are being crushed.

    SAM (V.O.)
    More than they usually are?

    MAX (V.O.)
    No, actually.

    SAM (V.O.)
    Alright, time for a vehicle inspection.

    MAX (V.O.)
    Aye-aye, cap'n!

    SAM (V.O.)

    MAX (V.O.)

    SAM (V.O.)
    Alright, inspection complete!

    MAX (V.O.)
    Now let's get this train wreck a-rollin'![/center]

    We hear a KEY go in an ignition, and an engine starts up. This booms over the speaker. While the car is trying to start, the DESOTOS rise up about two feet into the air.

    That's all I got. Any ideas, anyone?
  • I like it so far, but maybe more of an interactive ride, like the Monsters Inc. ride at Disney Land. I'm thinking of... *shudder* Lorne's Sam & Max ride. Except, you know... better.
    You could ride around in a mini Desoto, fearing all the time that you might crash into something (or someone), while Sam and Max are guiding you through your... I'm gonna call it a "mission" for lack of a better word.
  • Yeah...I have no idea what happens in Lorne's Sam & Max ride. >_> <_<
  • I'd ride it! The scripts sound great. I can't wait to read more of it when you have the time to make up some more. ^_^
  • I will go ahead and spoil one part of the ride:

    We go to the moon.

  • So... this'll be like the Spider Man ride at Universal Studios Orlando Resort, right?
  • Guy in a Box;171051 said:
    Yeah...I have no idea what happens in Lorne's Sam & Max ride. >_> <_<</div>
    Basically, you're riding a little Desoto, and you get to see a lot of stuff that has happened to Sam and Max. But maybe for your ride, the people would experience the adventure, too. The props on Lorne's ride were just cardboard cutouts.
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