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Joke Thread

posted by Noname215 on - last edited - Viewed by 3.1K users
On these forums, we’re all comedians, so I figured we could have a thread where we share jokes.

I’ll start.

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel down the front of his pants. The bartender says, “What’s that there for?” The pirate says, “Arr, it’s drivin’ me nuts!"
97 Comments - Linear Discussion: Classic Style
  • WarpSpeed;805941 said:
    If you're going to post old IT jokes, they're not complete without:

    Q: Why do computer scientists always mix up Halloween and Christmas?

    A: Because 31 OCT = 25 DEC
    don't get it lol
  • What's the definition of bravery?
    A man with diarrhea chancing a fart.

    What did one ass cheek say to the other?
    Together, we can stop this shit.
  • Those are crap jokes.

  • Milosuperspesh;806045 said:
    don't get it lol
    It's also 19 HEX and 11001 BIN if that helps. If not, don't worry, it's not that funny, and it's the kind of joke most of the population won't get.

    So now I have to tell another, more understandable joke, huh? OK,

    How to keep a compulsive link clicker busy all day: Click for answer.
  • it's a prank more than a joke.

    for anyone who shares a pc/mac/laptop with other people, but only use one account/admin on them.

    and they are dropping hints or complain abotu you being secretive about what you do, make a folder and name it 'yourname' private stuff and have it on the desktop amongst some other icons.. in this folder make another folder and call it secret or for my eyes only, in side that folder make another name it 'stop looking', repeat this till you have about 8 or 9 (max address size) each time escalating the threat then in the last folder put a youtube link to rick astley 'rick roll' never gonna give you up vid maybe rename it they still won't know till they click on it...
  • What do you call a guy with a blue penis?
    A tight-fisted wanker.
  • I was so sure the answer was going to be Dr. Manhattan...
  • DON’T REMIND ME! Fuckin’ Zack Snyder/Alan Moore/Billy Crudup...
  • To be perfectly honest, I kinda thought it just made sense. He was losing his humanity the entire time and clothing is a purely human construct. Probably realized that since nothing could hurt/effect him anyways there was really little point to it beyond social convention. I don't even see what the big deal was, really... so he has the same functional parts as literally every other male on the planet. It would have been just silly if he somehow became gender neutral with his transformation, especially given the realism basis of the source.

    Though, to be perfectly fair... you were the one who brought up blue penises in the first place...
  • Going old school:
    Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! HaHaHaHaHaHa
    *Cricket sounds in the audience* And now I will escort myself from the building, as I have now earn the title of worst joker ever.
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